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Jokes :D

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T-man

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One day an old German Shepherd starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a panther heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

The old German Shepherd thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep s*** now!"




Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the panther is about to leap, the old German Shepherd exclaims loudly,




"Boy, that was one delicious panther! I wonder, if there are any more around here?"

Hearing this, the young panther halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.




"Whew!" says the panther, "That was close! That old German Shepherd nearly had me!"

Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the panther. So, off he goes.

The squirrel soon catches up with the panther, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the panther.

The young panther is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, squirrel, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"

Now, the old German Shepherd sees the panther coming with the squirrel on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?," but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old German Shepherd says...




"Where's that squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another panther!"

Moral of this story...

Don't mess with the old dogs... Age and skill will always overcome youth and treachery! Bull**** and brilliance only come with age and experience.
 

Enduro Karter

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BREAKING NEWS!
Kate Middleton is already wanting a divorce! After her marrage to Prince William and their honeymoon, Kate found out all rulers are NOT twelve inches...
 

kendelrk

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Tblack were here for building and help that comment wasn't cool nor was it on anyway funny, learn to grow up, and treat women with respect would you say that to your grandma? Or your mom? I don't think so, don't let your keyboard right checks your *** can't cash, because if you do your going to be in a world of trouble .
 

strang

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Sometimes when you cry no one sees your tears.
Sometimes when you're in pain no one sees your hurt.
Sometimes when you are worried no one sees your stress.
Sometimes when you are happy no one sees your smile.
But just try masturbating in Walmart's parking lot and see how much attention you get.
 

r_chez_08

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Sometimes when you cry no one sees your tears.
Sometimes when you're in pain no one sees your hurt.
Sometimes when you are worried no one sees your stress.
Sometimes when you are happy no one sees your smile.
But just try masturbating in Walmart's parking lot and see how much attention you get.

So wrong :ack2:
 

Rustydog2010

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not funny at alll

What an @$$

Tblack were here for building and help that comment wasn't cool nor was it on anyway funny, learn to grow up, and treat women with respect would you say that to your grandma? Or your mom? I don't think so, don't let your keyboard right checks your *** can't cash, because if you do your going to be in a world of trouble .

But then racist jokes are alright? Right.
 

strang

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You know the honeymoon is over when the Comedians start.



The liberals are asking us to give Obama time. We agree...and think 25 to life would be appropriate. - Jay Leno


America needs Obama-care like Nancy Pelosi needs a Halloween mask. --Jay Leno

Q: Have you heard about McDonald's' new Obama Value Meal?
A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it. --Conan O'Brien

Q: What does Barack Obama call lunch with a convicted felon?
A: A fund raiser. --Jay Leno

Q: What's the difference between Obama's cabinet and a penitentiary?
A: One is filled with tax evaders, blackmailers,and threats to society.The other is for housing prisoners. --David Letterman

Q: If Nancy Pelosi and Obama were on a boat in the middle of the ocean and it started to sink,who would be saved?
A: America! --Jimmy Fallon

Q: What's the difference betweenObama and his dog, Bo?
A: Bo has papers. --Jimmy Kimmel

Q: What was the most positive result of the "Cash for Clunkers" program?
A: It took 95% of the Obama bumper stickers off the road. --David Letterman
 

devino246

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You know the honeymoon is over when the Comedians start.



The liberals are asking us to give Obama time. We agree...and think 25 to life would be appropriate. - Jay Leno


America needs Obama-care like Nancy Pelosi needs a Halloween mask. --Jay Leno

Q: Have you heard about McDonald's' new Obama Value Meal?
A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it. --Conan O'Brien

Q: What does Barack Obama call lunch with a convicted felon?
A: A fund raiser. --Jay Leno

Q: What's the difference between Obama's cabinet and a penitentiary?
A: One is filled with tax evaders, blackmailers,and threats to society.The other is for housing prisoners. --David Letterman

Q: If Nancy Pelosi and Obama were on a boat in the middle of the ocean and it started to sink,who would be saved?
A: America! --Jimmy Fallon

Q: What's the difference betweenObama and his dog, Bo?
A: Bo has papers. --Jimmy Kimmel

Q: What was the most positive result of the "Cash for Clunkers" program?
A: It took 95% of the Obama bumper stickers off the road. --David Letterman

Gee, I wonder what side you lean towards...:mad2:

We really need a no politics rule.
 

tblack2458

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Did you know that WOMAN spelled backwards is SANDWICH?

WTF he says this which is incredibly demeaning to woman but when I make a joke about them everyone acts as if they are a woman now if I offended anyone I am terribly sorry I do not like offending people but was simply trying to post a joke I have heard said countless times with no one ever taking offense from it before
And from the looks of all of your profiles most of you are young and dont know how frustrating woman are.
 

dave1701

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Q: Have you heard about McDonald's' new Obama Value Meal?
A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it. --Conan O'Brien

My favorite.
 

devino246

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most of you are young and dont know how frustrating woman are.

Au contraire, most of my cousins are girls and I spend LOTS of time around them. Tell them your leaving the house at 1, you'll be leaving around 1:15, only after a little arguing over the makeup and hairdryer.:roflol:
 

sexyvicta

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you all stupid.

making fun of womenz when they arn't around is hillarious.

You will understand one day.
 
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